Before we get started, I want to take a quick moment to acknowledge the amount of time that has elapsed between our two adoring protagonists. When we first met Christian the date was Monday, May 9, 2011. Ana and Christian first had sex 4 days ago, on Saturday, May 21. So, here we are. She's known him less than a month and is about to sign her freedom away to him. To be clear, this "contract" doesn't actually state that there are any legal consequences for not following through? So as far as I can tell, the worst thing that will happen if you breach the contract is no more sex. Still, for the purposes of this series, this 10-page document is somehow legally binding because EL James doesn't understand how words work. I mean, I guess the consequence for Ana could also be the fact that he could beat her senseless whenever he feels like it... who knows? This is confusing and Ana should get a lawyer.
Christian is waiting at the bar when he sees Ana. As he goes to her, he takes time to appreciate her appearance.
"She's wearing a little makeup. Not too much. And I remember when she first fell into my office how ordinary I thought she looked. She is anything but ordinary. With a little makeup and the right clothes, she's a goddess.
She shifts in her seat and her eyelashes flutter." -- yaaaaaaaaaaas it's been too long
Ana is quick to get down to business, clearly nervous about discussing this shit in such a public place. Christian tells her he's nervous, too ("Yeah, I'm human, too, baby... just." I get what you're going for here but it doesn't make any fucking sense. Just what? Did we stop you mid-thought or are you suggesting that you're just barely human? Either way, this sentence is shit, and I can guarantee that unless you've recently been captured and had your bones fused with adamantium, you're more than "just barely" human). Moving on.
"She purses her lips to stifle her smile. 'You know this contract is legally unenforceable.'
'I am fully aware of that, Miss Steele.'
'Were you going to tell me that at any point?'
What? I didn't think I'd have to . . . and you've worked it out for yourself. 'You'd think I'd coerce you into something you don't want to do, and then pretend that I have a legal hold over you?'
'Well, yes.'"
A few things. First, WE ALL THINK THAT, CHRISTIAN. Second, did you just flat out admit that you're coercing her into something she doesn't want to do? Is that what I'm seeing right now? I mean, it seems like to you, it's one thing to make her do something she doesn't want to do, but it's fucking barbaric to then ALSO pretend that he has legal rights to her. Interesting.
"Anastasia, it doesn't matter if it's legal or not. It represents an arrangement that I would like to make with you - what I would like from you and what you can expect from me."
Allllllllllllllllright, Christian. I have a definition for you now.
con·tract
noun
käntrakt/
- 1.a written or spoken agreement, especially one concerning employment, sales, or tenancy, that is intended to be enforceable by law."both parties must sign employment contracts"
Wait, what's the last part of that there? Is intended to be enforceable by law?? Christian, sweetie. What you have here is not a contract, it's a glorified pinky promise.
Anyone can make a pinky promise, Christian.
After admitting she hasn't eaten all day (honestly, does she just hate food?) this totally normal and not rapey at all conversation takes place.
"'You have to eat, Anastasia. We can eat down here or in my suite. Which would you prefer?'
She'll never go for this.
'I think we should stay in public, on neutral ground.'
As predicted - sensible, Miss Steele.
'Do you think that would stop me?' My voice is husky.
She swallows. 'I hope so.'
Put the girl out of her misery, Grey.
'Come, I have a private dining room booked. No public.'"
She follows Christian into the private dining room, and the negotiations commence. But not before an appetizer of raw oysters is delivered, Christian not bothering to check that she's ever had one before - which she hasn't.
"'Really? Well. All you do is tip and swallow. I think you can manage that.' I stare pointedly at her mouth, remembering how well she can swallow." -- eesh.
"'So I don't chew it?'
'No, Anastasia, you don't.' And I try not to think about her teeth toying with my favorite part of my anatomy."
The negotiations are difficult to talk about here because it's honestly just pages of ridiculous shit and I can't possibly include it all, no matter how much I'd like to. But, as if Christian was reading my mind during the last chapter, he offers this explanation of 'ownership'.
"'The ownership thing, that's just terminology and goes back to the principle of obeying. It's to get you into the right frame of mind, to understand where I'm coming from. And I want you to know that as soon as you cross my threshold as my submissive, I will do what I like to you. You have to accept that, and willingly. That's why you have to trust me. I will fuck you, anytime, any way I want - anywhere I want. I will discipline you, because you will screw up. I will train you to please me.'" -- I honestly think that EL James just doesn't know how words work. Instead of using the word "ownership" when apparently that isn't what you mean, maybe just take the extra time to explain things. I can't suspend my disbelief enough to be convinced that a guy who somehow built a multi-billion dollar empire uses words for abstract effect, and not their actual definition. Flimsy verbiage is how contracts fail, Christian. As a businessman, you should know that.
After some uncomfortable sexual tension, with Christian trying to persuade her to be his Sub because she'll never have to think again ("All those decisions - all the wearying thought processes behind them. The 'Is this the right thing to do? Should this happen here? Can it happen now?' You wouldn't have to worry about any of that detail."), EL James reminds us all why it's just a shitty idea to mix food and sex.
"I implore her with a look. But her eyes glint with sensual disobedience (the fuck does this look like????) and a smile that lifts her lips (well it'd be pretty fucking weird if her smile made her frown, wouldn't it?). Still holding my stare, she picks up an asparagus spear and deliberately bites her lip (no, no, no, no).
What is she doing?
Very slowly, she places the tip of the spear in her mouth and sucks it.
....
I watch, mesmerized, hardening by the second."
RIP asparagus. Jesse Garon would be proud.
And finally, for the second time in this whole series I've ever been proud of Ana, she decides to leave. Christian has been trying to use sex as a weapon this whole chapter ("Christian, you use sex as a weapon. It really isn't fair." -- see?) and she's got her wits about her enough to get the fuck out.
"''I could make you stay,' I tell her, knowing that I could seduce her right now, in this room.
'Yes, you could easily, but I don't want you to.'"
There are more pathetic attempts by Christian to make her stay, all of which she refuses, so he finally concedes and has her car brought to the door. She drives a VW Beetle that has probably seen better days, but she's a fucking college student, what do you expect?
"She tries to reassure me. 'Okay, she's old. But she's mine, and she's roadworthy. My stepdad bought it for me.'
When I suggest that we could do better than this she realizes what I'm offering and her expression changes immediately.
She's mad.
'You are not buying me a car,' she says emphatically." -- well too fucking bad, Ana, because not only is he going to buy you a new fucking car, but he's going to SELL THIS ONE WITHOUT BOTHERING TO ASK YOU FIRST.
She drives off, and as predicted Christian emails Taylor (his butler? bodyguard? manny? who knows) and says he needs the Audi delivered there tomorrow. Maybe it's me, but I'm sure she'd be much less angry if he bought her a normal person's car? Like get her a fucking Honda, jesus.
He then fires off 2 emails and a text, asking if she got home okay, none of which she responds to, and we're left with a final thought from Christian.
"You've really fucked up this deal, Grey."
This is how I imagine Christian's contemplative face.
Chapter 10 "baby" count: 3
Total "baby" count: 45
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